If Nortel was a movie, it might be called “The Company That Couldn’t Shoot Straight”.

Two years after filing for bankruptcy protection, Nortel is still on life support but refuses to go away quietly even as it divests its last assets – a patent portfolio chock-a-block with all kinds of wireless goodies.

Yesterday, Nortel unveiled plans to sell 6,000 patents to Google for $900-million. The deal, however, is structured so competitive bids can surface. Among the parties rumoured to be interested are Research in Motion, which covets Nortel’s LTE assets.

If it was as simple as an auction happening, that would be one thing. But in the whacky world of Nortel, nothing is that simple. According to GeekWire, Microsoft says it has a “worldwide, perpetual, royalty-free license to all of Nortel’s patents that covers all Microsoft products and services, resulting from the patent cross-license signed with Nortel in 2006.”

What it means is the sale of Nortel’s patent portfolio could become a complicated and messy situation, which could not only see competitive bids but a legal battle over who owns or controls the patents.

Seemingly lost within the shuffle is that the patents are the last chapter in Nortel’s disappointing demise from tier-one telecom equipment supplier to non-entity. What was once the star of Canada’s high-tech industry is going to disappear into the history books.

Hammered by hubris, a series of strategic and tactical mistakes, weak senior management and, finally, an unwillingness to fight until the bitter end, Nortel will soon disappear, although the battle over the patents could see the “patient” hang on for a few more months.